Study of Beelzebub's Tales




42 Beelzebub in America


“For your better representation and understanding of this cause of the gradual disharmonizing of this inevitable being-function in the common presences of the American beings, you should first be familiar with a certain detail of just those organs which actualize the said function in their common presences.


“Among their organs for the complete transformation of the first food is one that exists almost everywhere under the name of ‘Toospooshokh,’ or, as they themselves call it, a ‘blind process,’ and in their scientific terminology, ‘appendix.’


“The action of this organ, as appointed by Great Nature, is that various connective cosmic substances separated by the transformation of the various surplanetary crystallizations which compose the ‘first being-food’ are gathered in it in the form of what are called ‘gases,’ in order that later, at the time of the elimination from the common presences of the beings of the already waste residue of the said food, these ‘gases’ should by their pressure assist this act.


“The gases gathered in this organ actualize by their so to say ‘discharge’ the mechanical action designed by Nature, independently of the general transformatory functioning proceeding in the beings, and only at definite periods of time established in each being differently according to subjective habit.


“Well then, my boy, thanks to their frequent trips to the continent Europe, the round trip taking from twelve days to a month, conditions are created for a daily change of time for the fulfillment of this established function, with the consequence that a serious factor results for the gradual engendering of disharmony in the process of their common fundamental transformatory functioning. That is to say, when for a period of many days, on account of the change of the established time, they fail to perform this indispensable function of theirs, and the ‘gases’ thus collected in this organ, not being utilized by them for the automatic action of the purpose indicated, and not fulfilling the design preconceived by Great Nature, gradually escaping from their presences unproductively into space—the totality of these manifestations of theirs, by the way, making existence on these passenger ships of theirs almost intolerable for a being with a normally developed organ for perceiving odors—then, as a result of all this, there often occurs in them what is called a ‘mechanical obstruction,’ which in its turn also conduces to the said gradual disharmonization of this fundamental transformatory function of theirs.