Study of Beelzebub's Tales




24 Beelzebub’s Flight to the Planet Earth for the Fifth Time


“Before going any further, I must here dwell a little on just what kind of beings there on your planet the other beings call learned.


“The point is that, even before this fifth sojourn of mine there, that is to say before that period when Babylon, as I have told you, flourished in every respect, those beings who became learned and were regarded by others as learned were not such beings as become and are regarded as learned everywhere in the Universe, nor such as first became learned even on your planet, namely, such beings as acquire by their conscious labors and intentional sufferings the ability to contemplate the details of all that exists from the point of view of World-arising and World-existence, owing chiefly to which, they perfect their highest body to the corresponding gradation of the sacred measure of Objective Reason in order that they might later sense as much about cosmic truths as their higher being-body is perfected.

“But from the time of what is called the Tikliamishian civilization until now, those beings, especially the contemporary ones, chiefly became learned who ‘learned-by-rote’ as much as possible about every kind of vacuous information, such as old women love to relate about what was presumably said in olden times.


“Clearly to represent and to substantiate in yourself the understanding just why such a peculiar craze arose in the individuality of that Persian king and became proper only to him, you must know that at the period of the Tikliamish civilization, in the town called ‘Chiklaral’ a three-brained learned being by name Harnahoom—whose essence later became crystallized into what is called an ‘Eternal-Hasnamussian-individual’—invented that any old metal you like, abundant on the surface of that planet, could easily be turned into the rare metal ‘gold’ and all it was necessary to know for this was just one very small ‘secret.’


30 Art


“From the very beginning of the arising of those theaters of theirs, they assembled and now assemble in them for the purpose of watching and studying the reproductions of their contemporary ‘actors’; no… they assemble only for the satisfaction of one of the consequences of the properties of the organ Kundabuffer, a consequence which had been readily crystallized in the common presences of the majority of them, and called ‘Oornel,’ which the contemporary beings now call ‘swaggering.’


“You must know that thanks to the mentioned consequences of the properties of the organ Kundabuffer most of the contemporary beings acquire in their presence a very strange need to evoke the expression in others of the being-impulse called ‘astonishment’ regarding themselves, or even simply to notice it on the faces of those around.


“The strangeness of this need of theirs is that they get satisfaction from the manifestation of astonishment on the part of others regarding their appearance, which exactly conforms with the demands of what are called ‘fashions,’ that is to say with just that maleficent custom of theirs, which began there since the Tikliamishian civilization and which has now become one of those being-factors which automatically gives them neither the time nor the possibility to see or sense reality.


“This maleficent custom for them is that they periodically change the external form of what is called ‘the-covering-of-their-nullity.’


“The custom of shaving the beard and mustache, now followed by all your favorites, is a very good example for confirming what I have just said.


“I must tell you that in past epochs these terrestrial professional actors had always to go with shaved mustaches and beards during the ordinary process of their existence.


“They had to shave these ‘expressers’ of masculinity and activity, first of all because, always playing the roles of other beings, they had often to change their appearance and for this they not only had to put on their face a corresponding what is called ‘paint’ but also to wear wigs and false mustaches and beards, which they could not possibly do if they had their own beards and mustaches; and secondly, because the ordinary beings of all former communities there, considering such actors dirty and a harmful influence and fearing to fail to recognize them if they chanced to meet them in ordinary conditions of existence and of somehow touching them, then promulgated everywhere a severe law, that the beings of the profession of artists or actors have always to shave their mustaches and beards in order to be unmistakable for other beings.


“While explaining just now to you the cause of the arising of the custom of shaving mustaches and beards among actors there, I recall a very sensible what is called ‘measure-of-justice’ of the three-brained beings of the epoch of the ‘Tikliamishian civilization’ connected also with the shaving of the hair, but in this case with the hair growing on the heads of the beings there.


“A law was then established and strictly enforced that those petty criminals among them who, after trial and sentence by seven elderly beings of the given district, had been assigned to one of the four already previously established categories of ‘immorality’ and ‘crime’—with which beings all of what are called their ‘prisons’ are now usually crowded—should for a definite term go about always and everywhere with one of the four corresponding sides of their heads shaved; and, furthermore, any such convicted being was obliged to uncover his head whenever he met or spoke with others.


32 Hypnotism


“And so, when thanks to a change of tempo of their blood circulation there is obtained a temporary suspension of the action of the localization of that false consciousness which has already become the ‘autocratic ruler’ of their common presences, thereby giving the sacred data of their genuine consciousness the possibility of unhindered blending with the total functioning of the planetary body during the period of their waking state, then indeed my boy, if the crystallization of data for engendering in that localization an idea of something opposite to that which has already arisen in them and somehow become fixed, is assisted in a corresponding manner, and if moreover the actions evoked by this idea are directed upon a disharmonized part of the planetary body, an accelerated change in it possible.


“When, during the period of the Tikliamishian civilization, the learned beings of the locality Maralpleicie first constated in their common psyche the special possibility of such ‘combinations,’ and began to search for ways of intentionally bringing one another into this special state, they soon understood and found the possibility of actualizing this by means of what is called ‘being-Hanbledzoïn,’ namely, that cosmic substance, the essence of which the three-brained beings of the contemporary civilization came close to understanding, and which they called ‘animal magnetism.’


“Most recently, by the way, when I was on this ill-fated planet a new maleficent means began to flourish there for doing the same with the psyche of the beings there, as there did and still does this branch of their science hypnotism.


“And this new maleficent means they call ‘psychoanalysis.’


“You must without fail also know that when beings of the period of the Tikliamishian civilization constated for the first time about this particular psychic property of theirs, and soon made it clear that by its means they could destroy in each other certain properties particularly unbecoming to be in them, then the process itself of bringing someone into this state began to be regarded by them as a sacred process and was performed only in their temples before the congregation.


33 Beelzebub as Professional Hypnotist


Beelzebub continued to relate further as follows:


“When I existed among your favorites as a professional hypnotist I made my elucidating experiments upon their psyche chiefly by means of that said particular state of theirs, which the contemporary beings there call the ‘hypnotic state.’


“For bringing them into this state, I had at first recourse to the same means by which the beings of the period of the Tikliamishian civilization brought each other into this state, namely, by acting upon them with my own Hanbledzoïn.


34 Russia


“In consequence of the fact that the existence of beings which had been put as a basis of the formation of this large contemporary community there and of their subsequent generations, proceeded in the course of many centuries in the neighborhood of beings who belonged to those Asiatic communities, who, thanks to various events, existed so relatively long a period in consequence of which in the process of their ordinary existence—as this in general happens from a long existence—very many good customs and ‘moral habits’ were gradually formed by themselves and became fixed in the process of their ordinary existence, then these Russians, after meeting with the beings of these, for terrestrial beings, ancient communities and even at times having friendly mutual relationships with them, gradually adopted and began to use in the process of their ordinary existence, many of the useful customs and ‘moral habits.’


“And so, my boy, thanks to the mentioned strange property of the three-brained beings of this planet of yours, which property, as I have already told you, arose and gradually became, soon after the Tikliamishian civilization, fixed in their general psyche—the intensity of the fixing proceeded chiefly in consequence of all the more deteriorating conditions around them of ordinary being-existence established by themselves—and which special psychic property already from the very beginning became obligatorily inherent in the common presences of beings composing this later largest community there, then on account of all this, they all in former centuries found themselves under the influence of beings of one or other of the Asiatic communities, and all the, as it is called, ‘external-mode’ and ‘psychic-associative-form’ of their ordinary existence proceeded also under their influence.


“And so, again in consequence of the fact that in the common presences of the three-brained beings of this planet Earth of yours who dwell on that part of the continent Asia which was called, and until now is called Russia, ‘being-Partkdolg-duty’ also finally ceased to be actualized, on account of which this, for them, most maleficent property of their psyche, namely, ‘suggestibility,’ began gradually to increase; and in consequence of the fact that they, thanks to changed circumstances which flowed from always the same terrifying process of periodic reciprocal destruction, existing only on that ill-starred planet, were deprived of the former influence and were compelled, not having the possibility of independent existence, to fall under new influences, they this time fell under the influence of beings of European communities, chiefly of the community which exists there under the name ‘France.’


37 France


“It is necessary to tell you that it had already become in general customary that when beings from the whole of the planet, who have already completely given themselves up to their, as I said, inner ‘evil-God,’ flock to this chief center of culture, then these beings, among other of their maleficent actions, further do this: they occupy themselves out of idleness, in order to satisfy their whims, with devising ‘new-forms-of-manifestations-of-their-Hasnamussianing,’ or as is said there, with ‘new fashions,’ and spread them from there over the whole of the planet.


“This Hasnamussian usage, that of devising ‘new fashions,’ existed in former civilizations also; during the Tikliamishian civilization it existed under the name of ‘Adiat,’ and at the time of Babylon, under the name of ‘Haidia.’


“‘Adiat,’ ‘Haidia,’ or ‘fashions,’ consist in this: the beings devise various new means of being-manifestation in ordinary existence, and means for changing and disguising the reality of one’s appearance.


42 Beelzebub in America


“I remember very clearly one of those periods when the beings of that time, who, by the way, according to the notions of your contemporary favorites, were nothing but ancient ‘savages,’ invented every possible kind of convenience for performing this same although prosaic yet indispensable being-need, on account of which these contemporary Americans, who in their naïvete consider themselves already civilized to the ne plus ultra, have invented these comfortable seats in their water closets.


“This was precisely during the period when the chief center of culture for the whole of your planet was the country Tikliamish and when this country was experiencing the height of its splendor.


“For this being-function, the beings of the country Tikliamish invented something rather like these American comfortable seats, and this maleficent invention also spread widely everywhere among all the other beings of that ill-fated planet.


“If the said invention of the beings of the Tikliamishian civilization were compared with the invention of these contemporary Americans then, according to the expression they sometimes use for comparison, the latter may be called a ‘child’s toy.’


“The beings of the Tikliamishian civilization invented a certain kind of ‘comfortable couch bed’ which could be used for sleeping as well as for what is called ‘lounging’ so that while lying on this ‘wonderful contrivance,’ and without manifesting the slightest being-effort whatsoever, they could perform this same inevitable being-need for which the contemporary beings of the continent America have invented their ‘seats of ease.’


44 In the Opinion of Beelzebub, Man’s Understanding of Justice Is for Him in the Objective Sense an Accursed Mirage


“The events which gave rise there to this peculiar coincidence, namely, that these strange three-brained beings connected the names of many beings of our tribe with this fantastic idea of theirs, came about owing to the following:


“Soon after our beings departed from this planet, a certain Armanatoora who had belonged to the epoch of the blossoming of the Tikliamishian civilization, and who was by profession a priest—but from among those of this profession whom others regarded as ‘learned priests’—was the first who built up a whole ‘religious teaching’ based on this maleficent idea.


“It was just in that same ‘religious teaching’ that he, among other things, explained for the first time that certain invisible spirits existing among them spread ‘external Good and Evil,’ and compelled men to take in and manifest this ‘Good and Evil’; and that these ‘spirits,’ the spreaders of ‘Good,’ were called ‘Angels,’ and those ‘spirits,’ the spreaders of ‘Evil,’ were called ‘Devils.’


48 From the Author


After all I have said I consider it necessary to say and even to emphasize further that all the historical data which have reached contemporary people and which have chanced to become known also to me, namely, the historical data concerning what really did occur in the past in the life of people, and not just those data invented by contemporary what are called learned beings, chiefly from among the Germans—with which histories all the rising generation is stuffed almost everywhere on the Earth—clearly show that people of former epochs did not divide into two streams of life, but that all flowed along in a single river.


The general life of mankind has been divided into two streams since the time of what is called the “Tikliamishian civilization,” which directly preceded the Babylonian civilization.


It was just from then on that there gradually began to be and ultimately was finally established that organization of the life of mankind which, as every sane-thinking man ought to constate, can now flow more or less tolerably only if people are divided into masters and slaves.


Although to be either masters or slaves in a collective existence among children, like ourselves, of the COMMON FATHER, is unworthy of man, yet thanks at the present time to the conditions existing which have already been thoroughly fixed in the process of the collective life of people, the source of which lies in remote antiquity, we must be reconciled to it and accept a compromise that, according to impartial reasoning, should correspond both to our own personal welfare, and also at the same time not be contrary to the commandments specially issuing to us people from the “Prime-Source-of-Everything-Existing.”


Such a compromise, I think, is possible if certain people consciously set themselves, as the chief aim of their existence, to acquire in their presences all the corresponding data to become masters among those around them similar to themselves.


Proceeding from this and acting according to the wise saying of ancient times affirming that “in order to be in reality a just and good altruist it is inevitably required first of all to be an out and out egoist,” and also profiting by the good sense given us by Great Nature, each one of us must set for his chief aim to become in the process of our collective life a master.