Study of Beelzebub's Tales




18 The Arch-preposterous


“Well, then, just after my arrival in that solar system Ors, when I began visiting its various planets and first descended upon the surface of the planet Saturn, it turned out in connection with the aforesaid, that one of the beings who had undergone the sacred action of ‘Vznooshlitzval’ regarding my person was what is called there the ‘Harahrahroohry’ of all the three-centered beings arising and existing on the planet Saturn.


“On the planet Saturn a being is called the ‘Harahrahroohry’ who is the sole chief over all the other beings on that planet.


“Well, then:

“When I first descended on the surface of the planet Saturn and mingled with the three-centered beings there, it chanced that I had occasion the next day to meet the Harahrahroohry himself of the planet Saturn; and during what is called our ‘Exchange-of-subjective-opinions’ he invited me to make his own ‘Harhoory,’ that is, his own palace, the chief place of my existence during the whole of my sojourn on their planet.


“So, my boy, when we were once talking simply according to the flow of what is called ‘being-associative-mentation,’ and happened to touch on the question, among other things, of the strange results actualized in the manifestations of the particularities of the Omnipresent-Okidanokh, the venerable Harahrahroohry of the planet Saturn first mentioned that one of his learned beings-subjects, by name Harharkh, had recently devised for the elucidation of many of the previously unexplained properties of that cosmic substance, an exceedingly interesting appliance which he called a ‘Rhaharahr,’ the chief demonstrating part of which he called a ‘Hrhaharhtzaha.’


“And further, he offered to make, if I wished, the necessary arrangements for showing me all these new inventions and for giving me every possible explanation of them.


“The result of it all was that the following day, escorted by one of that venerable Harahrahroohry’s court, I went to the place of existence of that Gornahoor Harharkh where I first saw those novel elucidatory experiments with the Omnipresent-Okidanokh.